First things first: Lubricant can be classified into four major categories: water, oil, petroleum, or silicone. Water-based is the safest option if you’re using condoms (it won’t break down the rubber, while oil or petroleum lubes can), plus it’s the easiest to clean up and wash off.
Look, dry mouth happens to the best of us. Whether you’re on certain medications that give you cotton-mouth or you’re just, like, straight up dehydrated, getting/giving head with a sandpaper tongue is an uncomfortable experience for everyone involved. Add a bit of unflavored (flavored lubes could cause irritation) lube to the receiver’s vulva before diving in, and everyone will be a little bit happier.
First off, no guy should ever whine about how using a condom “ruins sex.” Buck up, my man. But if your partner is looking for more ways to increase feeling while being protected, Eric Garrison, sexologist and author of Mastering Multiple-Position Sex, has a suggestion. “Many guys complain that a condom diminishes the sensation,” Garrison previously told Cosmopolitan.com. “Adding a little lube ups the sensitivity he feels inside the latex.” If you put a drop or two inside the rubber before you unroll it, that might unlock a world of feeling, and it should certainly be enough to shut him up.
Real talk: if the idea of rubbing your dry palms on your partner’s penis—or alternatively, spitting into your hands every few minutes—seems meh, have I got news for you! A generous helping of lube will make even the most awkward hand job–giver look like a bona fide handy expert. Lubing up his penis and your hand will ensure that any movement feels heavenly, and gives you more room to experiment with new techniques.
The amount of times I’ve hooked up with a guy only for him to be like, “I’ve never used lube before,” is legit kind of horrifying. Lube has a reputation for being “for old people” or people who are “dried up” but like, did you really think the 30 seconds of manic making out and pawing at my boobs were going to make me that wet, Josh? Every sexual encounter can be improved upon by using lube. Legit every single one. Lube makes sex more comfortable and pleasurable for everyone involved, and gives you room to get more creative with sex.
If you’ve never put lube inside a condom, WYD?
Same with fingering. Is there anything worse than a clammy finger exploring underneath your underwear when you’re not wet? Nope. Make things easier for both the fingerer and the fingeree by applying some lube to both the receiver’s vulva and clitoris and the giver’s fingertips for maximum sensation sans uncomfy friction.
The vagina responds more to pressure rather than friction, sex therapist Cyndi Darnell previously explained to Cosmopolitan. This is but one reason dry humping is considered better than sex to some. By lubing yourself up, you have more room to amp up the pleasure-inducing pressure without the potential of an underwear rug-burn.
While you might hit a limit of “yeah, too much” during vaginal intercourse, that threshold will be much lower with anal sex, because unlike your vagina, your booty does not create its own lubricant to make things slidey and glidey. SO LOAD IT ON THERE! When it comes to any butt stuff, too much lube and precaution are never enough.
Cosmo's sex expert offers tips on using lubrication during sex