The drug tests we purchased are pretty standard pee tests. Basically you wee into a cup, take the cap off the drug test, and then submerge the little rectangular piece at the end for about ten seconds. Results take about five minutes. The test we bought for the purposes of this experiment are used specifically to detect THC and nothing else.
First up, we had Jolene try out a 17-ounce bottle of Rescue Detox. According to Karen, the very sweet Applied Sciences customer service lady we reached at the “LIVE SUPPORT” number listed at the bottom of the bottle, Jolene had to avoid eating for five hours before she did the cleanse. Luckily, it was Sunday, so Jolene had just woken up from a four and a half hour nap after spending the morning smoking and eating an entire large portion of Popeye’s mac and cheese, as one does.
Our test was simple. We ordered a ten-pack of THC pee tests from Amazon for $7.99, and recruited a regular recreational weed smoker—a 28-year-old woman we’ll call “Jolene”—to test out these drinks over the course of a week without altering her normal weed habits. She’d try out one drink every two days, and take a control test before starting each one to make sure she was still testing positive before drinking them. Then she’d follow the directions on each bottle and see whether she could piss herself clean.
Photo on left from Getty Images. Right and all other photos via the author
The drink itself was a bright, neon yellow that looked slightly radioactive. Jolene said it tasted like synthetic blueberries and had a distinct aftertaste. She chugged it down over the course of ten minutes, and then refilled the bottle twice, choking down gulp after gulp of weird-tasting water until her stomach was bursting with 1.5 liters of liquid.
“Frequent urination indicates that you are experiencing optimal cleansing.”
While Jeff Sessions seems to believe otherwise, countless studies have shown marijuana to be significantly less dangerous than other Schedule I drugs like heroin and cocaine and much safer than legal substances like alcohol and tobacco. To add insult to injury, when it comes to pre- or post-employment drug testing—which most often takes the form of a urine test—marijuana is the substance that takes the longest to get out of your system.
These drinks can be expensive—up to $60 a pop—but that’s a small price to pay when your job may be on the line. They all offer the same thing: a same-day, temporary fix for your THC-tainted piss, so long as you use ‘em exactly as directed.
There are several of these on the market, “cleansing supplements” that, at a glance, seem to be nothing more than herbal energy drinks. On the back of each bottle, the language used is deliberately vague.
From the Stinger Detox to the Detoxify Xxtraclean Herbal Cleanse & Rescue Detox, we tested these detox drinks that say they’ll help you pass a urine test.
The more toxins you have in your body, the more bloat and fatigue you likely have, which is why you might see the weight come down very soon, especially around your waist, and a boost of long lasting energy throughout the day.
Consuming detox drinks is also proven to flush your body of toxins.
Detox drinks are a wonderful option for anyone looking to clean out their body and lose weight while doing it. It’s a great opportunity to feel and look the way you never have before. But the issue is, not everyone knows how to take advantage of them. If you’re intrigued by a juice diet, you’ll need to know how to use detox drinks to lose weight safely.
In fact, according to a 2011 study published in the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, upon assessing a survey of 196 naturopathic doctors, 92 percent of respondents reported using detox therapies, while over 75 percent utilized detoxification to treat patients as a means for preventative medicine, environmental exposures, and more.
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But you don’t need science to tell you that detox drinks provide more health benefits than a program that sends processed foods and drinks to your house for weight loss and detoxification.
Detox programs aren’t just about losing weight.
If you are experiencing bloating, fatigue, constipation, belly fat, skin problems, headaches, and mood swings, or are just looking to kick sugary drinks and utilize something different for when you need to quench your thirst or get an energy boost, a detox cleanse is a great thing to consider.
A detox cleanse can also be extremely beneficial for supporting digestion, cleansing the liver, and even promoting a healthy glow from head to toe.
If you want to know how to use detox drinks to lose weight safely, you'll need to understand the power of whole food ingredients.