Drinking orange juice is essential during your recovery process. The vitamin C inside of the OJ actually rewires your brain and stimulates the receptors in your eyes to make you see more clearly. Not really. But, it does taste delicious and will surely wake you up in one of the most pleasant ways possible. Extra pulp is always a plus.
Don’t just lie there in your puddle of self disgust and Hot Cheetos, do something about it. Take action and live to smoke another blunt! Smoke the weed. Don’t let the weed smoke you. These are the 10 easy steps to successfully recovering from a weed hangover.
To get over your hangover, you’re obviously going to need a breakfast fit for a king. And for five dollars, how much better can you get than the vaunted “Triangle Offense” at McDonald’s during breakfast hours? Comprised of a Sausage Egg & Cheese McGriddle, a breakfast burrito and hash brown; this early meal is quite literally everything. It’s not too little, not too much. It’s just damn right. Eat this and tell me it’s not the truth. I dare you.
Why not? Achieve full body tranquility by getting a full body massage. preferably with a happy ending. There’s nothing like a middle-aged Asian woman rubbing her hands up and down your body for an hour, then schwapping your meat furiously until you feel the shame of a thousand suns. But if this isn’t you’re thing (or you’re a lady), just play with some furry little animals. It should have the same effect.
There is hands down no crazier feeling than being smacked out of your mind and so full to the point of heavy breathing and full siesta. Coming from experience, this can even be more dangerous than drinking. Your life is in disarray, you feel all sorts of floaty and just cannot seem to get a grip on things. It’s that bad.
Between the Domino’s pizza, Oreo McFlurry and General Tso’s chicken from the Chinese spot, your body is going to have to deal with a mass exodus. Whether or not this is the first or second thing you do, always make sure this is the first or second thing you do. Clearing your cache will do a lot for you spiritually as you will be able to think more freely and approach the day with a positive and sin-free mindset. Don’t let yesterday’s transgressions dictate your future. Get rid of these demons!
You’ve made it this far without smoking (almost 24 hours) and you’re on top of the world. Hell, you can probably accomplish anything at this point. Call your grandma who, although you love dearly, thinks that you’re wasting your life away. Let her know that you’ve finally turned things around and that you are even thinking about getting back into school. Tell her tales of your productive day and just watch as you get back into her good graces. This should give you great mental clarity and a sense of peace knowing that the old lady is proud. ish.
There’s only two words to describe this natural phenomenon — weed hangover. Somewhere during the night before, between the eight blunts, ten bong rips and three weed brownies, you lost yourself. You forgot your limitations and decided to become a master chief, which subsequently led to you munching your face off. While this may have sounded like a great idea at the time, the result is truly one of the most defeating emotions you could imagine.
This game is 90 percent mental. Take a deep breath, look into the mirror and say to yourself, “No more weed today.” While this isn’t the easiest thing for a stoner to say, it’s one of the most vital steps to completing your transformation. By psyching yourself out, you will have the upper hand over your mind and, in turn, you will control the pace of the day.
There is absolutely no worse feeling in the world than waking up with that horrible cotton mouth, a pounding headache and a $30 Chinese delivery receipt on your lap. Not to mention, a bunch of your homies (and some locas) all passed out in yourвЂ¦