While Jeff Sessions seems to believe otherwise, countless studies have shown marijuana to be significantly less dangerous than other Schedule I drugs like heroin and cocaine and much safer than legal substances like alcohol and tobacco. To add insult to injury, when it comes to pre- or post-employment drug testing—which most often takes the form of a urine test—marijuana is the substance that takes the longest to get out of your system.
There are several of these on the market, “cleansing supplements” that, at a glance, seem to be nothing more than herbal energy drinks. On the back of each bottle, the language used is deliberately vague.
Karen told her to drink Rescue an hour before “cleansing time,” then refill the bottle with water twice and drink that within 30 minutes. She was then supposed to pee three times, after which she should be good to go for three to five hours. Quite a lot of work!
According to a poll released by the Society for Human Resource Management, about 57 percent of American companies subject employees to drug tests. That’s down significantly from 81 percent in 1996, possibly because employers are finding it increasingly difficult to find quality candidates who are able to pass.
For context, Jolene’s marijuana consumption is probably slightly, but not much, below average for stoners. She smokes a bowl most days after work, and blazes up two to three times a day on the weekends. Occasionally she’ll have an edible or do a dab, but says she usually sticks to traditional smoking methods—bowls, bongs, and joints. Most of these drinks caution “heavy” users to double their dosage, or go with a more concentrated version, so if you smoke more or less than Jolene, you’re likely to have different results. And none of the results we got here should be considered scientific or at all conclusive.
Luckily for them, and those of us who enjoy the occasional after-work blunt or who use marijuana to treat otherwise unmanageable chronic illnesses, there’s an entire industry devoted to beating the dreaded piss test. With enough advanced notice, there might be several ways you could go—quitting outright, subbing your dirty pee with a straight edge friend’s. But if your boss springs the news on you with only hours to spare, you’ve got pretty much one viable option: detox drinks.
Our test was simple. We ordered a ten-pack of THC pee tests from Amazon for $7.99, and recruited a regular recreational weed smoker—a 28-year-old woman we’ll call “Jolene”—to test out these drinks over the course of a week without altering her normal weed habits. She’d try out one drink every two days, and take a control test before starting each one to make sure she was still testing positive before drinking them. Then she’d follow the directions on each bottle and see whether she could piss herself clean.
Photo on left from Getty Images. Right and all other photos via the author
“Frequent urination indicates that you are experiencing optimal cleansing.”
From the Stinger Detox to the Detoxify Xxtraclean Herbal Cleanse & Rescue Detox, we tested these detox drinks that say they’ll help you pass a urine test.
However, perhaps a better description of these drinks is a healthful drink or a smoothie.
Many people combine fruits and vegetables in their smoothies. This can be an excellent way of making vegetable smoothies taste good, while not overloading a fruit smoothie with too much sugar.
Share on Pinterest A detox diet may help a person lose weight.
Fruits are relatively high in sugar, so fruit-based smoothies will usually taste great. However, because they contain lots of sugar, people should drink fruit smoothies in moderation.
The use of the word detox is not always appropriate. Detox drinks may boost health, aid in weight loss, and support the body’s natural detoxification processes, but this is different from medical detoxification.
According to the Office for Disease Prevention and Health Promotion, three-quarters of people in the United States do not consume enough fruit and vegetables. Consuming drinks containing fruits and vegetables as part of a balanced diet may be a good way of helping a person get the nutrition they need.
For example, a lemonade cleanse detox drink, containing lemon juice, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper, sounds healthful, but it contains relatively few nutrients and is high in sugar, which most people should try to reduce.
A green smoothie, containing carrots, kale, celery, beets, turnip, spinach, cabbage, parsley, or cloves, will contain lots of nutrients but little sugar, salt, and fat.
Detox drinks do not remove toxins from the body. However, some drinks are very beneficial and can promote overall good health. Learn more about detox drinks here.